Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
