She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
