please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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