Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize