so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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