like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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