as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
