JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
