All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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