she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
