She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
it was like having sex with a tree stump
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
