I just pynch a tree in the face
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
