have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize