don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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