If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
BRING THE BAGELS
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
