So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
third nipple confirmed
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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