Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
