Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize