my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
