Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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