I CAN MOONWALK!
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
