Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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