Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
