We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
This baby is an asshole
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
