check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
