I need help removing her.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
