The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize