Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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