I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
