So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
