Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
