420 ftw
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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