Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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