this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
