Everything about him screamed your future.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
