Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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