Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
