I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
