That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
