Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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