Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Randomize
