i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
she pinky promised me she was 18
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
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