just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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