Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize