The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize