She's JV to your varsity
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
