just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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