the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
