when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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