it wasn't lemon gatorade
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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