he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
