So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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